Mom & Me Four Archive

...yesterday was a very low key day. I got in some very satisfying catloging. You'll find it interesting to note that my mother played Brain Age again yesterday, after breakfast, which looks like it'll become a habit. You'll remember that she played day before yesterday at the same time, although didn't play the day before. Yesterday it was as though she'd never seen or heard of the game. The game, I am pleased to report, is very forgiving. She even had trouble remembering how to hold and use the stylus. It was like all that had left her. Despite this, she pronounced the game a winner...didn't ask why there was already a profile for her; she thought she'd never played. She didn't flinch, either, when Dr. Kawashima welcomed her back. A review was necessary to remind her to read the left screen then look to the right screen as far as what to do next. It took a bit more coaching from me to get her through a short course of daily games. I was surprised but not taken aback. My reaction was, "Oh, okay. So, this is how it's going to work." At least she continually and enthusiastically reapproves of the game.
    I don't think she thinks of it as a game because I draw a blank when I use that word. I'm not sure, yet, which word we'll use to identify it, which word will occasionally trigger memory.

    We watched a spate of old movies, yesterday, the highlight of which was Yankee Doodle Dandy. I'm going to have to look for a copy of that movie. I'm not sure whether I should be ashamed to say this but at the end of the movie Mom and I were both in tears. This was not the first time during the movie that I teared up or Mom wiped her eyes excessively. During the first playing of "Over There" I sobbed (SOBBED), that this song was the greatest "go to war" song ever written.
    I was already in one of my rare, I-understand-patriotism moods, put there by peripherally watching Mr. Smith Goes to Washington just previous to being captivated by Cagney. Did you know that his actual sister played George's sister in the movie? There is a striking resemblence. His unique dancing style and incredible leg power blow me away every time I see this movie.
    Anyway, we weren't ready to dispell the mood, so immediately following two patriotic movies we decided to watch The American President. Thankfully, I was not in tears at the end of that one, although I would have been if we'd chosen to watch Dave. After all this patriotic stuff, I initiated a conversation about why I, of all people, was reacting so emotionally to these movies, the war movie in particular.
    "I think," I proposed, "that I'm crying because I wish my president made me feel like this about my country. The U.S., you know, used to be considered generous...quick, yes, but elegant. Not true, anymore."
    "Maybe it's just time for your period," my mother surmised.
    I laughed. Could be. I'm still menopausal. Maybe I'm having yet another final hormonal hurrah. Wouldn't it be interesting if patriotism came down to hormones.
    Is my mother patriotic? In a way. Deeply. In much the same way she is spiritual. Country is a value she takes for granted. Part of her pursuit of a Navy career was provoked, I think, by a quiet excitement about being An American.
    Am I patriotic? Hmmm...that depends on how you define patriotic. I am more deeply aware, now, how fucking lucky I am to be a born-into-it U.S. Citizen. I am also more deeply aware of the global drawbacks of "being an American". I am as humble as I can be about those, which, peculiarly, is quite a bit more humble than most people because I lived in an environment, during my raising, in which I understood that I needed to apologize for being "An American". At the same time, Guam was begrudgingly grateful to "America".
    One thing that I believe my experience is responsible for me understanding: We are not "Americans". There are many more "Americans" than us. We are citizens of the United States of America. We must try to remember that we are not any longer the only America. We've been stopped from expansion by some entrenched cultures. I don't care how many people give me the "oh, gag me" sign at this little feint to diversity. We can no longer ignore that we are also, and, maybe soon, even first, Citizens of the World.
    My mother considers herself, provisionally, a citizen of the world. She considers that "Americans" have several keys to several cities. A practical attitude, I suppose.
    Dementia certainly makes a contribution to her political profile, now, but, I ask you, when she answers the Quick Alzheimer's Test question, "Who's the current President of the United States?" with, "What difference does it make?" after 87 years of living under U.S. Presidents, I ask you: Dementia, or seasoned political sense? It is interesting to note that she noticed several times (a-boing-ga-a-boing-ga-a-boing-ga) that the flag, viewed through the window of the checkout office at the hospital (this was after the blood transfusion), was at half mast. Regan had died, I think a couple of weeks prior, before Mom entered the hospital. So, I reminded her several times, at her request, of this.
    Each time she was reminded she'd nod and say, "Oh, well that's too bad. He didn't look good."

    All in all, a very interesting (because it was serendipitous) way to spend July 4th.
    Mom had very little energy. Atmospheric pressure was not steady, yesterday, but it didn't rain. It should have. As I type this I'm looking at the the radar: It looks as though we've got some rain coming. I hope it drops, today. It's supposed to. Significant temperature drop from yesterday. Chance of rain all day, 40%. Windy. I'll dress Mom warm today.
    She's been copping more sleep than usual. I've been letting her do this, as I've been copping a little more alone time than usual.
    Today is a good day for making those scones. It ended up, yesterday, being too warm for either of us to consider starting up the oven.
    I hope it rains. No reason to go anyplace. I haven't decided whether to let Mom sleep in or attempt to rouse her at her 12 hour sleep mark. I'll peek in on her and see what sort of vibes I get.
    Later.